I figured out I went the wrong route
Struggles that lead me to self-betterment but I still had doubts
Pain turns into happiness,
But realize it's only temporary so cover up the sadness
Cause the trials are just around the corner
You have to write the past in the obituary in alphabetical order
Forever sharpening my conscious
I've got a lot to call this
But these nineteen years weren't a waste
No matter how low I've been it's just what I needed
You have to go through pain to live life with a joyful taste
Even if on the inside your heart still bleeded
I will always be growing
Learning about myself, constantly stroking my beard
Crying every night, most not knowing
Is everyone this way or am I just weird?
If I knew I would be where I am right now I would've just stayed
Inside the place I call yesterday.
But that's a lie. Everything I have is inside my mind's eye.
This struggle is an experience.
Am I living what I learned or giving false appearances.
Dwelling on sadness only opens the door for depression
But at the same time it builds multiple regressions.
Yeah I know.
This journey is tough
I have everything to show
But everything isn't enough.
I'm taught that my feelings I must contain
But I let it out to crush the heartaches and pains
Life is a living cell
I can't tell, because my mind seems to be in a shell
No one states my destination
So I'm still facing inward incarceration
I smoke and think these are the times I'm not depressed
But I'm still depressed
Trying to lay my fears to rest
But they still haunt me.
Holding onto the last rope only allows a grip to pull me back down
"This is how it is." I tell myself.
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